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Joseph C. Noto, along with a group of other Collaborative divorce attorneys in Bergen County, attended a seminar presented by Elana Katz, a LCSW. on the subject of “Going from Polarization to Collaboration with your team and the clients”. The major point she wanted all of us collaborative divorce attorneys to walk away with is: “The client always makes sense.” Before a person can makes a rational decision s/he must get rid of the emotions on the right side of the brain. The left side of the brain is the “thinking and decision making” part. As collaborative divorce attorneys we must help the client go from the right side of the brain to the left side. There are no “Bad guys or “good guys” when doing a collaborative divorce. So when doing a collaborative divorce work as a team and respect the other person’s feelings. Do not jump to the conclusion he or she is a good guy or bad guy. Joseph Noto learned that 90% of a communication is “non-verbal”, therefore you need to be careful that you do not emit an emotion non-verbally to your client. You could inadvertently be giving a non-verbal judgment which is your opinion and it is not necessarily your client’s. It was a great lesson on “what to do and not do” in a collaborative divorce when you are a collaborative divorce attorney in Bergen County.
